What's wrong with me??

I crave ALL the forbidden. All!! What's wrong with me??
I'm an Eve true and true. But well, what more is there to be said?? I am after all of Eve's blood. Eve herself is a woman in me, flesh and blood. Why can't I express myself?? I have NO idea. I thought I was good at it. Till I began to hurt all those I love. The more I love someone, the more the person gets hurt. More often than not, it'll be a guy. I write metaphorically. Too metaphorical as Suria says, but that's the way I express myself. I can't be simple. I'm a complex being.

So save me Lord. I have no idea.. I can't even understand myself. Is that why I put myself through the torture??

I prefer working with animals. I'm sensitive. People hurt me easily. I'm a hopeless romantic. And my heart, mi corazon is worn on my sleeve. It really is.







I miss the old times. When stuff was so easy. Growing up is just a pain in the butt. I miss the old times when I could feel like a child again. Sometimes I just feel like the rheumatic arthritic old lady in me wants to burst out!! CMON, cmon child in me. Pop out again. I used to be able to sleep with a smile on my face. Now I awake with a frown thinking of the day ahead. Burdens are always there.

If a power could be given to me, I'd say I want the ability to turn back the clock. To the past. I always say I never regret what I do. But.. Turning back the clock would certainly ease a lot of pain.



My keyboard and Lil's drumset. I miss jamming with her, now my keyboard remains untouched. Of black and white virgin keys.
Art and music. the only way I can truly express myself other than writing. Sigh* The bliss of being immersed in the two of them. Does wonders for a broken heart.

My past would not leave me alone too. Why?? I mean why won't it?? Does it come back to haunt me for a reason??

Am I being selfish?? Selfish till I let ALL my problems hold me back. But I only let myself worry when I become human again. Human enough to leave room for my own thoughts and feelings to emerge.

I miss my keyboard. My piano. My King Dribble. And yeah,my family and Lynn!!



My dearest Dribble..

Sigh* I get happy and high with only the simplest in life. What simplicity can do to a complex mind. SIGH* With the dawn of a New year, I hope everything can resume back to normal. I need normality in my life.. Not abnormality. Too much of it is a curse..



Can't wait to hit a club with Caline again. And the peepos!! And Lynn, gosh!! I have to club with you. Someday. One day. Soon. Sooner than soon. I miss you and now that I frequently update my blog, I know you read it from time to time.

My telepathic twinnie, you know that I love you :) SO much!! Though we are separated by distance, I know indeed, we still have that telepathic ability. LOL!! All hail the Queen of stitchland :)

And with that, three.. two.. one..

BOOM!! COWABUNGA, CIAO!!